Wednesday, 4 September 2013

Real Women Have Curves...

This statement is one of the worst out there. Women come in all shapes and sizes. Some have a more curvy figure, others (like myself) have always been naturally slim. This doesn't make us any less of a woman or anorexic, it just means our bodies are built a little different to those with curves.

Ever since I was little, I've always been the skinny girl; because I started dancing when I was three, I've always been able to maintain a slim frame. I'm also a very faddy eater and always have been. There was a time when I was too skinny; I was that malnourished and dancing my ass off every night, that I had to go and see a dietitian. I was anorexic. I ate one meal a day and danced most days for at least three hours. At primary school, a dinner lady used to have to sit next to me to ensure I ate my lunch. This lasted for years probably from the age of about 8. Then one day, I realised that dance wasn't fun anymore and that I needed a break. I was 15. Since then, I've still struggled with my weight. I've always been classed as underweight from my BMI index and I don't see that changing any time soon.

I binge eat too which doesn't help. Some days, like today, I'll sit and eat my weight in junk food and then there'll be other days, probably tomorrow, where I go back to eating just one meal. I know it's not healthy but I don't think it's something I'll ever be able to overcome. At the moment, I'm pairing this with exercising most days for at least an hour. I know I'm not fat yet I trick my brain into thinking that I am in order to keep me motivated.

So when somebody calls me anorexic or bulimic, I get very offended. People don't realise that it's not only a serious eating disorder, it's also a mental illness. You convince yourself that you're too fat so you either don't eat at all or you throw up everything you do eat. It's dangerous. 

So if anyone out there thinking about it or is currently suffering, I get it; just know that instead of starving yourself, strive to be fit not skinny. Exercise by all means but try and eat too. Anorexia is not an illness that just evaporates after a while, it stays with you for life. Even if it does go away like mine has, it will always be at the back of your mind every time you go to eat a piece of cake or a chocolate bar. Also if you're doing it to impress someone, don't. You need to get fit for yourself; never ever starve yourself to fit in or even worse to get a guy.

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